BREAK THE FACADE

Were you taught, like I was, to put up a wall of professionalism between you and your client? Were you taught to try to look smart and stay in control? To keep your personal foibles out of the relationship and focus on sounding cool and competent? 

On a recent study group call, an advisor told me that her superpower is sharing her life experience with her clients and that her clients responded by thinking, "she's just like me." It builds a bond between them that opens the door for her advice.  

Samantha is onto something there! Our power doesn't come from our competence and control; it comes from our vulnerability. Our power comes from the wisdom we have gained through life experience.  

When Samantha shared her story, I had a vision of a Japanese pot repaired with veins of gold. If you aren't familiar with it, it's called Kintsugi, which means "join with gold." And according to the BBC, it is "a reminder to stay optimistic when things fall apart and to celebrate the flaws and missteps of life." 

As advisors, our missteps and misfortunes become our greatest teachers and the lessons we can most readily share with our clients.  

I have been married and divorced. I am a step-parent. I lost a parent at a young age, and a single parent raised me. I have experienced both poverty and wealth.   

If I am willing to share the lessons I have learned through all of those challenges with my clients, I am in a much better place to advise them. Not only will I have something to say, but they will be much more likely to listen! Because I am like them.   

As with Kintsugi, our broken parts become our most valuable assets. We are taught to keep clients at arm's length. Forget that; let them in! 

If clients want a robot, they can literally get one through an AI-driven app, and they can pay a lot less for it! Clients want to be understood. They want someone to can guide them with a compassionate hand. They want the human connection.  

I want to encourage you to let down that façade and connect with your clients through your own life experience. They will listen to you in a whole new way, and your work will be even more meaningful for you!   

With Purpose, 

-Lucila 

As much as we would like to, we can't reprogram ourselves in a moment. It takes time and community to relearn the authenticity that was beaten out of us all as we learned to "sell."